Men: Cultivate an abundance mentality

A man looking thoughtfully out of the window — source

Many of us grew up for whatever reason thinking that the best way to a woman’s heart is by showering her with attention. And yes, this sometimes works, but it may have the opposite effect from what you intend.

We may have grown up watching chick flicks or even Bollywood movies where the man gets a target woman and chases (stalks?) her until she finally is convinced of his undying love and marries him.

But the thing is, you see, this doesn’t always work and can cause the opposite effect. Women can detect neediness in men. When you act needy, she takes this to mean that you don’t have options. She is your best option, and therefore YOU need her more than she needs you.

Women want men who are wanted by other women. If you aren’t wanted by anyone, does that mean you’re a picking? That you are someone that she should compete for?

Or does it make you a backup, a fall back, a last resort when the well is dry?

If you want to be at the top of the pile, you need to start with an attitude change. Grow an attitude of abundance.

This applies even in a marriage relationship. The difference in that in a marriage, the commodity becomes attention and time.

In both cases, how do you stop looking at women as a scarce resource? How do you get a…